Happiness Destroyer: Perfection
I’ve probably talked about this before, but it’s a big one that most of us fight every day. We think we need to be the perfect spouse, the most-together parent, the best employee, the most-liked boss, the top student, the perfect kid, the best whatever hat you’re currently wearing.
I’m going to let you in on a little secret – you will fail.
Really. You’re not the best. At any of it. And you can sacrifice everything else to be the best if that’s what you truly believe your purpose is OR you can try your best to be whatever you want to be and let go of the notion of perfection.
Just let go.
Be a good parent.
Be a good employee.
Be a good person.
Not the best. Not the brightest. And not the most perfect.
The destroying nature of perfection is it keeps us chasing happiness instead of enjoying it. Perfection makes us feel like constant failures – like no matter how hard we try, we aren’t perfect.
Not everyone can be the best. Literally. Not everyone can be the best. That’s why it is an impossible ask.
Shifting the mindset isn’t easy, but is totally worth it in terms of happiness (and sanity). Here are some simple things you can do to celebrate good instead of chasing perfect.
Celebrate the good. Start celebrating all the things you are good at. We all can’t dress our kids in homemade, Pinterest-inspired Halloween costumes that become the envy of Instagram. Are your kids happy in their store-bought attire? Than congrats, you won at Halloween!
Stop competing. Life isn’t a competition and we need to stop seeing it as such. Your good is different from their good because your happy is different from their happy. Stop comparing your happy to your Instagram feed or you to your Facebook feed. We aren’t in competition.
Embrace failure. This is tough but so crucial. If we only see failure as setbacks toward our path to perfection we can’t be happy with our situation. Failures aren’t setbacks but lessons in happiness. Instead of viewing life as a list of failures on your way to perfection, try seeing it as lessons that make us good.
Be okay with average. Yes, this goes against EVERYTHING we have been taught. But average means you’re doing alright.
Are you a good person? Then you’re good enough in my book. Really.